Sequel to Murtagh muntah: Revenge of the elder
by bleedingRose11
Summary: Poor Murtagh is abused by his brother, the amateur chef. Yes, now he is forced to eat his ominous cookings, yet murtagh isn't going to stay still and let him be victim, yes he has a trick up his sleeve. The tragedy genre is not seriously tragedy.


There were strange things going on in Carvahall and tragedies are about to strike, again.

Murtagh poured the clear liquid into a bottle and sealed it with lame tissue balls pronto and grinned maniacally.

Since that "Vile chicken soup incident" that his _darling _brother supposedly "cooked" for him that had caused him 5 hours barfing and "business", he seeks revenge!

_Revenge is sweet, _Murtagh thought.

_If he takes this potion he will end up just like me! 5 hours barfing and__ "business". Good job Murtagh, I love being me, e_xcept he didn't love himself like "Gilderoy Lockhart" in Harry Potter.

Any way back to the story,

Randomly, the supposedly dashing protagonist entered the room.

"Broooootherrr ♥." Eragon chirped joyfully which wasn't that joyful because the sound had been chirped by 'Eragon.'. It was so loud, Murtagh went deaf for a second and the windows cracked.

Murtagh trying to keep his temper and patience stable, reluctantly replied, "Yes brother?"

"I caught a pw -e- e- ty doe in the spine!"

Randomly we can hear Sloan's spazing,

Any way our sequel continues.

Murtagh's gut tensed.

"A doe you say? Then what about it?"

"I roast it!!!"

Murtagh's face paled like sour milk. He had feared that the amateur chef had cooked another meal except the term amateur did not suit him at all because he can't even cook.

But a candle (not a light bulb) turned on Murtagh's ping pong ball sized brain.

_Heheheheh, if there is lunch there are drinks and if there are drinks, my potion comes in…_

"All right. Let's see this 'roasted doe' of yours."

Together, they went out the house and sat down on a log. Eragon sliced a piece and slammed it on an empty brass plate and handed it to Murtagh.

The meat was black and overcooked and it oozed black oil and had popping black bubbles on it, it would take a genius like Einstein to comprehend what it is even though we all doubt Einstein could even comprehend it even Stephen Hawkings wouldn't be able to.

Murtagh took his knife and started slicing the meat but it was impossible. It was as hard as a rock. _How the hell did Eragon manage to slice the meat?!_ Murtagh started pounding on the meat. But he must remain calm or other wise his supposedly genius plan would be ruined.

Murtagh waited for the perfect moment to snatch Eragon's water bottle like a lion hiding in tall grass.

15 minutes passed, Murtagh was getting tired. Just then, he heard Saphira greet them and Eragon looked away.

_Now's my chance!_ Murtagh grabbed Eragon's water bottle and poured the potion into it with incredible speed. Then he quickly placed it at Eragon's feet.

After the meal which was not a meal after all because Murtagh's failure at eating it and his darling little brother's failure at cooking it, Eragon grew thirsty. He picked up a bottle and drank so did Murtagh.

"Eragon, I think I'll sharpen my sword ok? Please clean this up after your done eating"

"Ok bro!"

Murtagh dashed into the house and finally stopped. He screamed to the heavens at his success and guffawed maniacaly like some one who had just burst out from Alcatraz.

_This is just the beginning. _

"Muahahaha. Muahahah. MUAHAHAHA!!" he laughed while placing his pinky to his mouth like Dr. Evil in Austin Powers

We can hear the scraping noise of Murtagh's sword sharpening.

Scrape scrape scrape…

_The potion should work in about 3 minutes_Murtagh kept grinning, trying hard not to laugh. Sure he let out a snicker but it didn't make his brother's ears react, after all, his brain was to dumb to receive that small amount of noise.

3 minutes passed yet Eragon was just healthy as ever and singing to himself the teletubbies theme song, "…tinky winky, dipsy, la la , po.. teletubbies…"

"ERAGON!! SHUT UP!! STOP SINGING THE BABY SHOW THEME!!"

"Why? You like Winnie the Pooh. You even have the stitch of him on your cloak!!"

In fact that was true. Murtagh was a truly Winnie the Pooh fan.

Suddenly something grabbed and twisted his stomach. The pain forced Murtagh onto his knees.

_That idiot's cooking again!!!! I knew I shouldn't have eaten that burnt doe, and it didn't look like one any way!_

_But then why was Eragon still healthy as ever? __He ate the stupid doe too!!_

Then inside his stomach, something bit the stomach skin and yanks it.

"AUUGH!!" shrieked Murtagh

Eragon was as healthy as ever.

_No matter. He will suffer too_

But he didn't suffer for Eragon was still as healthy as ever.

10 minutes passed and Murtagh's stomach dilemma had worsened. E-coli bacteria were gathering followed with bile.

Eragon looked healthy as ever.

Then unexpectedly Eragon stopped singing abruptly, and then opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something.

"You know Muratgh, about lunch…" He began.

Eragon took a bottle from the drawer and jabbed it at Murtagh. Trying his best not to throw up, Murtagh doubled his efforts to speak but no words came out. He stared at the bottle with growing horror.

"Yea. I think I drank from your bottle by mistake at lunch. I took yours and you took mine. After all, Saphira was calling to me and didn't look where my hand was, so… yea…"

Murtagh was beyond shocked. He stared blankly at Eragon who was dumb-founded. His eyes were wide as an anime character. His mouth was wide open as if someone shoved a stick into it.

Suddenly a stink bomb exploded. Murtagh barfed on Eragon's shirt again which was supposed to be washed.

"Hey my shirt!" cried Eragon, though there was no difference to it because the dirt was so caked on.

Murtagh dashed into the toilet once again.

This time, Angela wasn't there to help.

5 hours passed. We can hear Murtagh barfing followed by the unpleasant sounds of farts followed by the flushing

Flush flush flush…

_51, 52…_Eragon counted once again.

Grinka grinka grinka…

"YAAAAAAARGHHHHH!!!!" Murtagh shrieked.

"God brother! I don't want to fix the window again!!"

Suddenly, Murtagh burst out of the bathroom which let out all that compressed into one room-fart methane gas.

The foul gas blew onto Eragon's face which caused him nausea.

Murtagh stood there for a few seconds then finally said two words, "The River."

Murtagh dashed outside and jumps into the river

"NO BROTHER! THAT IS WHERE I FISH-"

"TALLYHOOOOOO"

Too late for Eragon his elder had already dived into the river. Then Murtagh went still.

Eragon was abashed. He could only stare in shock while Murtagh sat still on the river bed and do his business. He could only stare the river color was turning from clear blue, to yellow ochre then to coke brown.

3 hours passed.

Murtagh was done with his business. Satisfied, he got up and walked passed Eragon whistling. Eragon who was still standing as still as a statue was beyond shocked. Amazingly in his pea sized brain, he remembered something, the fish.

Panic blossomed in his chest. He bent down and dipped his head in the river which was nothing more than a brown paint now but nevertheless, Eragon must save the fish. He could barely see images of fish.

"Skulblaka ven"

His mind joined with Saphira's and his vision improved. Now it was clear that the fish were all dead. _Stupid elder and his stupid business! _Suddenly in the water something like a pile of whip cream floated in front of Eragon's eyes except the whip cream was dark brown (we all know what it is).

Eragon screamed but only choked in the water. Then he gulped down a huge amount of the water. He arose out of the foul river and burst into the house and started yelling around. His dim-witted brain was to busy panicking to calm down like an ape who was severely disturbed.

Suddenly strong hands grabbed his shoulders. It was his elder. But then Murtagh repelled back and pinched his nose. Then in a muffled voice he managed to say, "Whad de hell did you do? Why do you sdik (stink)? Where did you go? Who inspired you? When did you do id? HOW CAnd (can) YOU??!"

"Bah! What's wrong with people today?! Am I the only one failing English? Any way, I had to check on the fish! They're dead because of you! You and your business! Then I saw your "brown whip cream" floating about and screamed. And yea. I kinda…"

"KINDA WHAT??!!! SAY IT BEFORE YOU STINK THE WHOLE HOUSE!!

Eragon cleared his throat and said, "I accidentally drank the water river."

Murtagh went still and was shocked with his brother's dumbness. Finally with a tired expression he could only say, "You know, drinking that water after what I have done with it would only make you…" Then Murtagh realized something. Something he always wanted to happen, "…have stomach ache and diarrhea!" He added with a cruel smile painted on his face. Murtagh said nothing else and walked passed Eragon whistling.

Eragon who knew nothing, was still wondering what that smile was all about.

Later that night, Murtagh sat quietly, still wondering how his plan had worked.

_That was a coincidence! I'm proud of doing business in the water! It's the reason he drank the water! And he never knew I was planning it. Ha! He'll suffer, _Murtagh was grinning to himself

He yawned widely, so widely swarms of flies came rushing into his mouth and started to spread eggs.

Murtagh yelled and dashed into the bed room spitting and hissing like a mad cat. He grabbed his water bottle and started mouth washing. Apparently, the flies went dead.

Then he heard an awkward noise

Hurk, youeech, haaack…

On Murtagh's bed, sat his brother Eragon, barfing and doing business.

"ERAGON!! THAT"S MY BED YOU'RE BARFING AT!! GET OFF!"

" hoek.. I'm sorry! You can sleep on my bed… haaaack…"

"EW! I'm not sleeping on your bed! There are flees! Bed bugs! What ever! I'll just sleep on the floo-"

Suddenly something sprained his stomach and twisted it.

"STUPID DAMN FLIES! LAID STUPID DAMN EGGS IN MY STUPID DAMN MOUUUUTH!!! There was an edge of madness in his tone.

Murtagh barfed onto Eragon's bed. E-coli were rising.

At last, the two siblings could only barf together.


End file.
